saying goodbye is never easy

the last thing i ever expected to happen actually happened. my nanny passed away while we were in mexico. she was an amazing woman, so healthy and so strong. she lived for her family and it was very clear that everyone she knew meant the world to her.

born may 6, 1911...she was 99 and a half when she passed away. we were certain she was going to make it to her 100th birthday, but the world had other plans for her. i still cant believe she is gone from the world...but at 99 years old, she lived a very full life. she had 4 children, 17 grandchildren, 36 great-grandchildren, and 4 great-great grandchildren. her husband passed away 31 years ago and she was alone ever since. he was her soul mate and she always told us that.

when i got the call in mexico from my mom, it was 6:30am. automatically i knew that something was wrong. no one calls someone on vacation that far away unless it is something serious. i thought it was about my opa who was having surgery, so when i heard it was my nanny i was crushed. when someone is 99 years old, it feels like they will live forever.

my nanny and i were so close when i was a kid. i used to sleep over at her apartment where she would always french braid my hair before bed. when i woke up i would take the braids out and be left with perfect waves in my hair. never once was there a tangle in my hair from the braids...she was the best braider! even at 99 she could still french braid; although not nearly as tight as they used to be.

what makes me the most sad is knowing that kingston will never get to know her like i did. she loved all the little ones in her life and only got to meet kingston a couple of times. i am thankful to have gotten a picture of her holding kingston, but am sad that we never got a 5 generation photo.

the one memory that we all share with nanny was her love for the song the rose. every event we had she always asked for us to sing her the rose. she would sit there and just smile and listen. occasionally a few tears would roll down her cheeks. every time i hear that song now, it brings tears to my eyes.

nanny, i will always always always remember you and your pure spirit. you were a woman of perfection. thank you for so many wonderful memories. i know you are in your happy place right now and that makes me so happy. i love you so much and will miss you like crazy. see you again in the future!



The Rose Lyrics - Bette Midler

Some say love, it is a river
That drowns the tender reed
Some say love, it is a razor
That leaves your soul to bleed

Some say love, it is a hunger
An endless aching need
I say love, it is a flower
And you, its only seed

It's the heart, afraid of breaking
That never learns to dance
It's the dream, afraid of waking
That never takes the chance

It's the one who won't be taken
Who cannot seem to give
And the soul, afraid of dying
That never learns to live

When the night has been too lonely
And the road has been too long
And you think that love is only
for the lucky and the strong

Just remember in the winter
Far beneath the bitter snow
Lies the seed
That with the sun's love, in the spring
Becomes the rose